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About the Ohio State Bar Foundation




Personal Story from an Ohio State Bar Foundation 2002 Fellows Class Member

Despite being an attorney and spending the past year working with the OSBF Class of 2002 on the Advanced Directives Project, I realized in March that my wife and I, too, had failed to have the conversation we are advising others to have with their loved ones.

Late this winter, my father-in-law, whose health had been gradually declining for years, took a turn for the worse. While he was in the hospital, it became apparent that his family might need to make some end-of-life decisions concerning his health care. The hospital asked my wife, Barbara, and her sisters if their father had executed a Medical Power of Attorney or a Living Will. Barbara didn't know what these documents were or if her father had them and called me for an explanation of what the hospital was asking. After hearing the purpose of the documents, she considered talking with her father about executing them. However, she expressed reluctance to do so because (1) her father might interpret it as a sign that Barbara assumed he was going to die, and (2) she was unsure whether he still had the mental capacity to make an informed decision. She didn't know what to do in her father's situation but knew she had to talk with her sisters and mother.

The following day, her father died in his sleep, but this experience underscored the importance of our class project. Despite my knowledge as an attorney and my association with this project, I never made the personal connection. I realized that I have not had this conversation with my 82 year old mother, who is currently in excellent mental and physical health. I also realized how important it is for my wife and me to have this conversation and these documents.

Although it doesn't seem as if there is ever a good time to have a conversation about our end-of-life care choices, there is no worse time to consider advance directives than when you or a loved one is grievously ill.

-Greg Travalio